Oh the drama (I create for myself)

Where do i begin?

I guess I start by re-stating (because I have said it before) that I struggle with food. Actually, a love for food. I have a tendency to eat more than my body needs just because of this so called "love". This is a very one sided relationship of course.

Food has the ability to make me feel FANTASTIC when I eat the right food and the correct amount. It also has the ability to make me feel FANTASTIC for a small moment, and then sluggish, overly full, guilty, and heavy, the very next moment if I eat certain foods and the wrong portion.

Ah, when I write it out it sounds so simple. Why don't I just eat the right food and the correct amount all the time??? I am constantly asking myself that question, and that is when things get complicated.

The above is a picture of my Therapist and my Nutritionist/Personal trainer.

I came across my therapist haphazardly. It was among my Dad's many books, I have heard about it many times but (no offense Dad) the title alone sounded pretty darn cheesy. I picked it up one day and started thumbing through it, thing is...I couldn't put it down. I read and read, and highlighted and highlighted- I swear this book hits on so many of my flaws it is ridiculous. The best part is almost every page had ideas that really stuck with me, and pretty soon I was setting goals and seeing improvement in myself and my habits. So, do I sound like and infomercial yet?

Next, I have an AMAZING extended family...I am serious. I won't get started on this because I could go on forever, but my cousins were some of my best friends growing up. Well... long story short, a couple of them introduced me to Live the Life. It is a program about developing healthy habits and setting and achieving goals. I love, love it.

I followed the first 12 weeks of meal plans and although I veered off course occasionally, I was really happy with the results I had. My energy levels were through the roof. And because it pushed goal setting so heavily, it helped me get my priorities organized, and carried over into other areas of my life as well. I was actually making time for personal scripture study -aside from the chaos we call "family scripture study" :)

When the first 12 weeks were over, my plan was to repeat the first Phase once more (because I loved the food- they give you a grocery list of whole food that you buy and then SIMPLE recipes that you prepare for the week), and then move on after I had met my goal. I don't know if it is because I have increased my activity level with all the running I have been doing or just because I should have moved on to the second Phase for something new and exciting, but I have really been struggling with my food intake. It is not that I am not happy with where I am at, I just want to finish what I started. I want to have a handle on my habits so that when I "have a moment", it is just that- A MOMENT, and then I get right back to what I know is best for me.

I know it is normal to have these ups and downs, I just had to put this out there so that I would feel accountable for my choices. SOOOO, to get to the point (finally) I am going post my progress paper each week that shows how well I followed through with my goals, not because anyone cares but because I know that will help me.

a little note: I was debating on whether to put this on here, because I know I am at a healthy weight (this isn't really about weight- it is more about habits), I just have a goal that I haven't quite reached, and I feel like we can ALWAYS push ourselves to be a better version of ourselves.